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Thread: Parental notification for abortion

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    Parental notification for abortion

    In my state there is a referendum on the ballot that will require doctors to notify the parents of a girl seeking an abortion if she is under 18. The bill still allows exceptions for medical reasons and based on court order. When I first heard of it, I thought it had no chance of passing. Looking back, though, a similar bill on the 2005 ballot lost by only 6%, and it DIDN'T have the exceptions clause that this one has.

    I honestly don't know what to think about this issue. I detest abortion, but I also detest governmental interference on this type of issue. If I had to pick right now, I guess I would vote no on the bill, since its usually safer for stability to stick with status quo. Theres a part of me that actually wants this bill to pass, though.

    I dunno. Anybody else have thoughts on the matter?
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    Do you have the actual printing of how it will be worded on the ballot?

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    Tough issue for me. My ex had a couple of abortions before she was 18. I'm glad we didn't have to tell her parents, and I'm glad (though it sounds terrible to say) I don't have any other children.

    But I saw how much having the abortions messed her up as time went along. I felt bad for her. Her first was when she was 16.

    I think the parents should be involved. I was young at the time and pretty much manipulated her every way I could to have it done both times she got pregnant.

    I put a lot of pressure on her, where if her parents would have known maybe she would have kept the first child, never had the chance of having another, and not been emotionally a wreck later in life. Of course, I didn't pry her legs open with a crowbar when she was on the table, but still I played a hand in what her decision ended up being.

    But some women can have an abortion like it's going to the doctor to remove a cast. They pop it off, and it's never thought of again.

    I say they should inform the parents.
    Last edited by Tex; 10-03-2006 at 03:32 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tex View Post
    Tough issue for me. My ex had a couple of abortions before she was 18. I'm glad we didn't have to tell her parents, and I'm glad (though it sounds terrible to say) I don't have any other children.
    But I saw how much having the abortions messed her up as time went along. I felt bad for her. Her first was when she was 16.
    I think the parents should be involved. I was young at the time and pretty much manipulated her every way I could to have it done both times she got pregnant.
    I put a lot of pressure on her, where if her parents would have known maybe she would have kept the first child, never had the chance of having another, and not been emotionally a wreck later in life. Of course, I didn't pry her legs open with a crowbar when she was on the table, but still I played a hand in what her decision ended up being.
    But some women can have an abortion like it's going to the doctor to remove a cast. They pop it off, and it's never thought of again.
    I say they should inform the parents.
    Ya... I have my own guilt in a similar matter.

    I broke up with a Girlfriend and she started seeing other guys. 3 weeks later I hear her tell me that she's pregnant and she doesn't know what to do. She says she's sure its mine, but I KNOW she was with ATLEAST 2 other guys in the short time after we broke up.(we broke up because she got into drugs like Coke and Meth and I wanted no part in it.)

    Well, before that happened I would have surely tried to convince her to try and keep the child, even knowing it wasn't mine. I'm not saying I would have helped raise it if it wasn't mine, but I would have if it WAS mine. I just wasn't sure. When the actual time came and she asked me what to do, I chickened out and told her to do what she wanted and that it wasn't my decision.

    I still feel real guilty about it. At the time I was 98% sure it wasn't mine, based on the timing and sheer probability(we only had sex 1 time in the month before breakup... things were going badly). These days all I can think about is whether or not it really might have been mine, though....

    My views on the matter haven't really changed much since then. I support a woman's right to choose but I think choosing abortion is wrong. I don't usually talk about my views on abortion much, though, since I always thought it was obnoxious to debate what someone can do with a body part you don't even have...
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    Quote Originally Posted by HaloGuardian View Post
    Do you have the actual printing of how it will be worded on the ballot?
    Sorry, no. Just an article in the newspaper.

    I suppose I could look it up on the internet, but I think I'll just go back to reading my book. I'll read it in greater depth when we get our mailers...
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    Quote Originally Posted by GoodCitizenDan View Post
    Ya... I have my own guilt in a similar matter.

    I broke up with a Girlfriend and she started seeing other guys. 3 weeks later I hear her tell me that she's pregnant and she doesn't know what to do. She says she's sure its mine, but I KNOW she was with ATLEAST 2 other guys in the short time after we broke up.(we broke up because she got into drugs like Coke and Meth and I wanted no part in it.)

    Well, before that happened I would have surely tried to convince her to try and keep the child, even knowing it wasn't mine. I'm not saying I would have helped raise it if it wasn't mine, but I would have if it WAS mine. I just wasn't sure. When the actual time came and she asked me what to do, I chickened out and told her to do what she wanted and that it wasn't my decision.

    I still feel real guilty about it. At the time I was 98% sure it wasn't mine, based on the timing and sheer probability(we only had sex 1 time in the month before breakup... things were going badly). These days all I can think about is whether or not it really might have been mine, though....

    My views on the matter haven't really changed much since then. I support a woman's right to choose but I think choosing abortion is wrong. I don't usually talk about my views on abortion much, though, since I always thought it was obnoxious to debate what someone can do with a body part you don't even have...
    Yeah, guilt's a bitch, and even though you don't know for sure it's still there. That sucks.

    I hardly talk about these issues, either. I rarely ever think about it unless something like this pops up and it makes me think back to when I was a young man and she had the abortions. One of which I was holding her hand in the room while they performed it. Bad shit, man.

    But it's a confusing issue. When I look at my daughter, seeing the beautiful, happy little 8-year-old kid she's become, I couldn't live without her. Me and my ex-wife could have aborted her, and I never would have known the joy my daughter brings into my life.

    The same might have been true of the child my high-school sweetheart could have had. But I was 16 at the time, she was too, and it seemed like the right, if not selfish, thing to do. The kid might have had a tough life because of me and my ex's age and immaturity.

    There's no telling. It scared the shit out of me, though, at the time. That I let it happen again was pure stupidity on my part.
    Last edited by Tex; 10-03-2006 at 05:04 AM.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by GoodCitizenDan View Post
    I support a woman's right to choose but I think choosing abortion is wrong.
    That sums up my stance pretty nicely. I'd vote against the bill just to keep the choice with the person who actually is pregnant. Maybe parents should play a bigger role in the lives of their children before they become pregnant.
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    Quote Originally Posted by outsider View Post
    That sums up my stance pretty nicely. I'd vote against the bill just to keep the choice with the person who actually is pregnant. Maybe parents should play a bigger role in the lives of their children before they become pregnant.
    Ya, it seems like passing the buck when someone says its the government's responsibility to let them know if their child is pregnant.
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    That is kinda how I see it, just more government involvement in something.

    I would vote for an abortion ban at the state level because abortion is murder. I don't give a damn what scientists say.

    But I wouldn't vote for this.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tex View Post
    Tough issue for me. My ex had a couple of abortions before she was 18. I'm glad we didn't have to tell her parents, and I'm glad (though it sounds terrible to say) I don't have any other children.
    But I saw how much having the abortions messed her up as time went along. I felt bad for her. Her first was when she was 16.
    I think the parents should be involved. I was young at the time and pretty much manipulated her every way I could to have it done both times she got pregnant.
    I put a lot of pressure on her, where if her parents would have known maybe she would have kept the first child, never had the chance of having another, and not been emotionally a wreck later in life. Of course, I didn't pry her legs open with a crowbar when she was on the table, but still I played a hand in what her decision ended up being.
    But some women can have an abortion like it's going to the doctor to remove a cast. They pop it off, and it's never thought of again.
    I say they should inform the parents.
    This would be a reason that i could see me supporting it
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    I think abortion is wrong. In my opinion, it should only be allowed if the girl was raped or something along those lines. Like Halo said, abortion is murder. If you can't keep your pants on, and especially if you don't use any form of protection, prepare for the consequences/risks.

    But this thread isn't about abortion as a whole :) Since it is allowed, I think yes, the parents should know.

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    Quote Originally Posted by iaacp View Post
    [abortion] should only be allowed if the girl was raped or something along those lines.
    Y'know, I've heard that reasoning plenty of times and I just don't support it. In fact, the need to make exeptions is basically what tells me that abortion needs to be legal and unrestricted.

    Let's say your girl gets pregnant at 16 and the only way she can get an abortion is if she accuses rape. No offence to all the women out there, but WOMEN FUCKING LIE!!!! When it's in their best interests to do so, and especially when a child may be involved, women will fucking lie like you have never heard before.

    The way the rape accusation system works is already screwed up. It's already possible for a girl to screw up a guy's life, simply because she had regrets, waking up the day after. Just look at that lying bitch that accused the duke lacross team. Even if they don't get put on some sexual predator watch list, they'll be remembered as 'those guys' their entire lives. It happens ALL THE FUCKING TIME, and the last thing this country needs is to give those self-serving bitches another excuse...
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  13. #13
    So we have a couple of let the state parent kind of parents in here?
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    Quote Originally Posted by GoodCitizenDan View Post
    Y'know, I've heard that reasoning plenty of times and I just don't support it. In fact, the need to make exeptions is basically what tells me that abortion needs to be legal and unrestricted.

    Let's say your girl gets pregnant at 16 and the only way she can get an abortion is if she accuses rape. No offence to all the women out there, but WOMEN FUCKING LIE!!!! When it's in their best interests to do so, and especially when a child may be involved, women will fucking lie like you have never heard before.

    The way the rape accusation system works is already screwed up. It's already possible for a girl to screw up a guy's life, simply because she had regrets, waking up the day after. Just look at that lying bitch that accused the duke lacross team. Even if they don't get put on some sexual predator watch list, they'll be remembered as 'those guys' their entire lives. It happens ALL THE FUCKING TIME, and the last thing this country needs is to give those self-serving bitches another excuse...
    I hadn't even thought of that angle. Yet another reason to not ask the state to nanny!

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    Quote Originally Posted by GoodCitizenDan View Post
    Y'know, I've heard that reasoning plenty of times and I just don't support it. In fact, the need to make exeptions is basically what tells me that abortion needs to be legal and unrestricted.
    Let's say your girl gets pregnant at 16 and the only way she can get an abortion is if she accuses rape. No offence to all the women out there, but WOMEN FUCKING LIE!!!! When it's in their best interests to do so, and especially when a child may be involved, women will fucking lie like you have never heard before.
    The way the rape accusation system works is already screwed up. It's already possible for a girl to screw up a guy's life, simply because she had regrets, waking up the day after. Just look at that lying bitch that accused the duke lacross team. Even if they don't get put on some sexual predator watch list, they'll be remembered as 'those guys' their entire lives. It happens ALL THE FUCKING TIME, and the last thing this country needs is to give those self-serving bitches another excuse...
    troof.

    Ok ok, they have to have a video. Lots of womens like to make sexies videos. If they dont have one, no abortion for them. If they do, the judge gets a hardon, and the girl gets an abortion. Win-win situation.

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    Quote Originally Posted by GoodCitizenDan View Post
    Y'know, I've heard that reasoning plenty of times and I just don't support it. In fact, the need to make exeptions is basically what tells me that abortion needs to be legal and unrestricted.

    Let's say your girl gets pregnant at 16 and the only way she can get an abortion is if she accuses rape. No offence to all the women out there, but WOMEN FUCKING LIE!!!! When it's in their best interests to do so, and especially when a child may be involved, women will fucking lie like you have never heard before.

    The way the rape accusation system works is already screwed up. It's already possible for a girl to screw up a guy's life, simply because she had regrets, waking up the day after. Just look at that lying bitch that accused the duke lacross team. Even if they don't get put on some sexual predator watch list, they'll be remembered as 'those guys' their entire lives. It happens ALL THE FUCKING TIME, and the last thing this country needs is to give those self-serving bitches another excuse...
    That's a damn fine point you made there.

    Your take on women aside, I'd say it's a noteworthy issue.
    If the conditions when abortion is to be allowed are outlined, people in need will be sure to fit them if it's the only option.

    I'd like to see everyone choose not to, but I also realize that's just my view.

    Good call, I'm out of rep though.



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    Quote Originally Posted by TheZenMan View Post
    If the conditions when abortion is to be allowed are outlined, people in need will be sure to fit them if it's the only option.
    Ya, thats pretty much my point summed up in a sentence.

    If we make rape the only determining factor, I bet reports of rape in the united states would increase by atleast 200-300%. So, not only will the woman's bad decision making hurt herself, but then it would reach out to hurt others as well.
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    Quote Originally Posted by GoodCitizenDan View Post
    Ya, thats pretty much my point summed up in a sentence.

    If we make rape the only determining factor, I bet reports of rape in the united states would increase by atleast 200-300%. So, not only will the woman's bad decision making hurt herself, but then it would reach out to hurt others as well.
    Surly not in every case, by I have to agree.

    Why damage more lives simply due to limited options?

    I think in order for anyone to make the 'right' choice, they have to have one in the first place.



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    Quote Originally Posted by outsider View Post
    So we have a couple of let the state parent kind of parents in here?
    You're such a dumbass it boggles the imagination. If a minor doesn't tell her parents she's pregnant, how the hell can they parent? A minor can know she's pregnant and have an abortion before any visible signs even appear to tip off the parents.

    They're out of the loop and don't know, so they can't possibly "parent" their child and help them make a wise decision.

    It's the reason, if you read my post, you'd see I want the parents to know by the state informing them because the daughter chooses to keep it hidden.

    Being a parent, which thankfully you are not, I would like to know if my daughter one day chooses to do something like have an abortion, which quite possibly could mentally screw her up for the rest of her life. I'll try to stop that from happening.

    I would like to think she'd come to me with a problem such as this, but I'm not naive so as to believe she'll come to me with something so horrific. Kids hide things. Did you never keep things from your folks, or were you sucking on your moms teets till you were an adult? I think I know the answer.
    Last edited by Tex; 10-04-2006 at 02:03 AM.

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tex View Post
    If a minor doesn't tell her parents she's pregnant, how the hell can they parent?
    Why is it the state's job to tell you that your child is pregnant?

    You ask how you're supposed to know... well... talking with your child would be a good start! Know who she hangs out with. Know if she's sexually active. Know where she goes and what she does. Watch for changes in personality. Jesus christ man, thats just involved parenting.

    My parents talked with the whole family at dinner every night. They watched what I did, and kept tabs on me when I was away. They knew what I was planning to do before I did half the time, simply because they cared and were involved in my life.

    Just cause you don't feel up to the task doesn't mean it should be left in the hands of the state. You want someone to keep tabs on your daughter because its too much of a chore to handle yourself? Hire a private investigator or something. The last thing we need are more confusing laws and government intervention just cause some people cant be responsible for themselves...
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